I Walk Away

Back in 2006 I started writing a series of short stories as ideas and characters popped into my head. Most times it was a vague scene I had to flesh out on paper that finally turned into something readable. Below is one such snippet that I found while rearranging my office. I’ve edited it a bit but for the most part this is how I wrote at that time. Enjoy!
Each step I took away from his door was slow and deliberate, as if the sound of my footsteps might trigger within him a desire to keep me at all costs.
“This is it,” he said.
The raw emotion in his voice announced the finality of that statement. We’d spent ten wonderful months together, but now it was completely over. I didn’t bother arguing or asking any tearful questions. I already knew why and knew there would be no second chances. She had won and didn’t matter what I did to or for him. He would always want her more.
I’d met Daniel at my sister’s annual Fourth of July picnic and we spent the entire day flirting. I’d been single for over a year but he was newly separated from his wife of five years.
“We just couldn’t work it out,” he’d said.
I did my best not to pry into his past. I wanted him to forget about it, forget about her, and move on in my general direction.It has been a long time since a sexy guy like him had shown a genuine interest in what I had to offer. I was more than excited. I was lustful.
We kissed beneath the fireworks and he explored my body with a sense of apprehension. I felt the hesitation as his hands moved over me. I remember thinking, it’s the memory of his wife. At the time I actually found it endearing. His face betrayed his guilt as he undressed me, but it didn’t slow him down.Once I began peeling off his clothes all else faded away. It felt so good having a man inside me again, I didn’t consider the consequences.Each thrust held an urgency in him that added to my pleasure, but almost seemed to cause him pain. He came quickly and collapsed on top of me in drunken exhaustion.
“Are you all right?” I asked, not particularly concerned with the answer.
He simply nodded, and I realized he was crying.
Thinking back on it, I realize his tears are what sealed my fate. I simply couldn’t let him go with such a guilty heart. I held him for a while as the fireworks continued overhead. We remained hidden amongst the blooms within my sister’s vast gardens. When the last sparkle faded from the sky and darkness finally returned, we dressed slowly and didn’t face each other for long moments. 
“I enjoyed that,” he finally said.
“So did I, but perhaps we should try a bed next time,” I said with a smile.
The relief on his face almost made me laugh. He agreed and followed me home in his own car.
The next two hours were spent in such pleasure, even thinking about it now gets me hot. His strong hands moved slowly over my sweat-dampened skin as I lay panting and begging for more.
“Please, please, don’t stop,” I said…more than once.
He complied by running his tongue up my stomach and between my breasts. I grabbed his hips in both hands, impatient for his erection as he playfully teased my throbbing lips with the tip.
“Please, please…”
I begged for it. I cried for it. Finally I screamed for it and he thrust into me almost violently. I climaxed instantly and he moaned.
“Oh, you are so fucking sexy.”
It was the only time he ever called me that.
Sex was always so good with him. I’d never had an orgasm every time with any man before and probably never will again. Is that what I’ll miss the most? Perhaps. Or maybe it’ll be the way he would wake me by kissing the tip of my nose. Maybe it’ll be the flowers he brought every time he came to my apartment. Perhaps it’ll be his scent on my pillow. I don’t know. Time has a funny way of twisting things sometimes so the memory of what I liked most turned into what I began to hate. He will always be there though, in the back of my mind, calling to my heart despite my efforts to silence him. No matter how quickly I walk away, or how far I go from his doorstep, I’ll always want him. I will always know that for a brief time, I was the other woman.
I Walk Away

Copyright August 24, 2011, MISSY JANE

This is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not construed to be real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locale or organizations is entirely incidental.
All rights are reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief excerpts or quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Editing this Weekend

What are ya’ll up to this weekend? Me? I’ll be starting my first round of edits for the new version of Resignation. What do you think of the new cover? I LOVE it! To be honest I loved the first cover put on this novella by the previous publisher too, but something about this one just really pops. If you previously purchased Resignation when it was released by Sapphire Blue you may notice a few changes in the manuscript. All of the main parts are there, but I fleshed out a couple of scenes I hope help the chemistry between Sol and Darina feel even more natural than before. I don’t have the blurb or release date yet, but as soon as I do you’ll be the first to know 😉

Introducing My Vampires

I know I’ve been threatening for almost a year now, but the waiting is nearly over. I will soon begin edits on my first vampire novella, to be published through Samhain in the Fall. If you visit my site there is a little bit of info on the characters. I promise to post the blurb as soon as I get the go ahead to do so.

In the Land of Humans…

It’s been a while, things here have settled into a sort of peace. Not true peace. Not like it was before. To be honest, I’m not sure I even remember what life was like before I learned to shoot a gun, swing a sword with deadly accuracy and defend myself against beings so much stronger than humans. I’ve learned to live with this new reality and am content in my role as wife to a man who isn’t quite human.

My new life doesn’t make me any less human, or any less sympathetic to human needs. I’ve seen the anger on many of your faces as I walk the streets of Georgetown. I’ve heard the whispers. If you’re not brave enough to say it to my face then fuck off. I’ve paid my dues. I lost a son to evil shifters and learned the hard way not even my neighbors could be trusted. However, not all shifters are created equal. Know your enemy, not just by physical traits but by deed as well.

For those who are interested, the Alpha of FNT, Sandulf Theodereiks, will be visiting the Animal Menagerie a day or two next week. He invites any human adult who wishes to meet him to do so. You will be given free entry. If you follow all posted rules, you will also be allowed to leave at any time of your choosing.
Know your enemy. I assure you, those you perceive as the enemy certainly know you.

Here I Am!

My apologies for staying offline the past couple of weeks. I’ve been checking in here and there, but nothing like my usual daily worship of the online social networks. With school right around the corner for my little ones, this probably won’t change for a few more weeks. However, I have one guest post planned in late August over at the Mind Readers blog. I’ll post more info as the date draws nearer.
Take care and talk to you again soon!

Great Reviews for Erotic Images!

So far I’ve found three reviews for my newest release, Erotic Images, and they all had good things to say!
Jen at Romancing the Book rated it as a Rose in Bloom. Read her full review here.
Nissie at Riverina Romantics gave it a 4 hearts. Read her full review here.
And, Heather on Goodreads gave it 4 stars. Read her full review here.
Have you read Erotic Images? Let me know what you think, or link your review from Goodreads, Amazon, or wherever, in the comments below.

Review: The Civil Wars

I’ve seen a lot of live performances in my lifetime: ballets, symphonies, musicals, rock concerts in everything from football stadiums to intimate nightclubs. I can now honestly say I’ve seen pure magic onstage. If you don’t already know who The Civil Wars are, let this be your introduction to one of the the BEST musical duet I’ve ever seen in my life. I learned of them when walking through my living room one day as their video played on TV. My daughters were listening to it and told me I had to hear them. Well, they say that a lot and I don’t always enjoy the music they feel I have to hear, but in this case I immediately agreed. A quick online search brought forth a few Youtube videos and a show date here in Houston. I simply couldn’t resist and bought two tickets. That is the best fort bucks I’ve ever spent. It was obvious from the minute they hit stage that they enjoy performing together. As I said, pure magic. They had the audience laughing and singing along with them. Their cover of the Smashing Pumpkins’ Disarm was beautifully done, even as different as it sounded. I could’ve sat and listened to them all night. The standing ovation they received at the end was very well deserved. My only regret was not being able to stay and have my poster autographed.

Normally, this would be the part where I spend a paragraph bitching about my husband bowing out of our date night because he just knew he wouldn’t like the music. In fact, he admitted after the fact that he almost did. However, he didn’t and off we went. The show was at a venue called McGonigel’s Mucky Duck in the heart of Houston. I’d heard of it but never been there and was excited about visiting a new live music venue. It’s been a while and I’ve seriously missed taking the time to sit and enjoy a live show. This was the first time we had dinner while watching the performance and the food was really good too. In fact, if I had to think of something to complain about it would be the forty-five minute drive to get there, but that’s a whole other issue.

So, before The Civil Wars there was a single guy with his guitar. His name is Rayland Baxter and his voice reminded me of Paul Simon. He was really good. I bullied my husband into buying his CD as soon as his set ended, but was disappointed to discover at home that the song I enjoyed most isn’t on it. That’s okay, some cyber-stalking helped me find it on Youtube.

I realized as I was sitting listening to his soul-wrenching melodies that though I don’t usually create a story soundtrack as other authors do, I could easily create one with his music. Once the Civil Wars hit stage what began as a seed in the back of my mind became a full-blown character, background and all, and I can hardly wait to introduce him to the world. Until then, please take my advice and have a listen to The Civil Wars. I promise it will be time well spent.

July is for Regrouping

I can’t believe summer is half through already. Where in the hell did it go? My Birthday Blog Tour was a huge success! By that I mean I had over 700 views on this blog alone, I met new readers and authors, I gave away a ton of prize packs and I just plain had fun. I hope everyone enjoyed it and will forgive me for not doing a July contest as originally planned. To be honest…I’m exhausted 🙂


So, here’s what’s happening with me now:
I’m waiting on edits from my Samhain editor so we can get the vampire novella underway. It’s titled Day Shift and will be out in the Fall. I have one submission in to Ellora’s Cave already and am working on another (Sean’s story from Two Week Trial). It’s tentatively titled Two Dates Max, and I hope to have it done within the next couple of weeks. 

I hope everyone had a great 4th of July. I’ll update ya’ll again soon!

…And the Winner Is…

I don’t know about you, but I’ve had an absolute blast this year on my Birthday Blog Tour. I’ve made some new online acquaintances and hopefully gained new readers, and definitely had a great time giving out prizes!
So, now it’s time for the last one. The GRAND PRIZE. First, I’d like to make it completely clear how I arrived at the winner. I created a database with a list of every blog post for the whole tour. I then added the names of each person who left a comment under the date for the post they commented on. A few minutes ago, I tallied up the comments and they reached 70. Can you believe it? 70 comments all month long! That’s great 🙂
Once I arrived at that total, I took a trip to random.org and let their auto number generator find my winner. And the winner is…
CHRISTLE GRAY!!!!!!! Whoohoo, congratulations!!!!!!
Thank you EVERYONE who joined me on my tour. I hope you had as much fun as I did, and will be joining me again next year 😀

An Interview with N.L. Gervasio

When I first became serious about writing back in 2006, I hopped online and looked for resources and like-minded folks. There was a plethora of both, but one site caught my attention and lured me in. It was a community of aspiring writers who were willing to critique each others’ work. I immediately signed up and met some awesome people. One of those writers is N. L. Gervasio (known as Jinxie), a fabulous author and all-around awesome person. She’s hosted me on her sites a couple of times and now that she has a book being released I can finally return the favor. Her book is called Nemesis: A Kick-Ass Girls Club Novel, and is available through Running Ink Press. Would you like a taste? Following my enticing interview with Jinxie is a short synopsis.  
Missy: Jinxie, keep in mind that you’re my first ever interview and don’t laugh at me (Technically I interviewed Jimmy Thomas second). Now, let’s see…um, tell us how you came up with the names Nemesis for your heroine and Clancy for your hero?
Jinxie: First ever interview, really? I’m so honored!
Well, I’m not sure you read this story as I posted it on that site where we met, but originally, the main character wouldn’t tell me her damn name (I know, right?), so I had to substitute—and this will sound crazy—mine in its place (the Jinxie name, not the N.L.). I just couldn’t even think of a name for her, but her story was unfolding fast (it took two and a half months to write), so I had to get it written down and I sure as hell wasn’t going to call her Heroine (although, that would have been hilarious on the site). Then, my CP/editor/business partner Sharon put a stop to it real quick once things started heating up in the story because she didn’t want to read about me, which had me falling over laughing because it wasn’t really me. Finally, I just started looking at nicknames with a particular meaning, used a Thesaurus, and ta-da—Nemesis, Nemy for short.
I can’t believe I just admitted all that. Only for you, Missy. Okay, I’d have done that for Sharon too, but that’s it!
As for Clancy—I needed an Irish name and I love Clancy Brown. ‘Nuff said. Sharon will really hate me now. She can’t stand Clancy Brown.

Missy: Cool. Okay, so did you already know Nemesis was going to be a kick-ass kinda girl? Or did she begin as someone different and evolve into her finished character?
Jinxie: Is there such a thing as multi-polar, rather than just bi-polar? LOL She was all over the damn place, but she was still a kick-ass type of girl. She’s always been that. Her emotions have just been off the charts. I’m still fixing some of that in the final edit as I answer your questions. It’s been hell. I keep catching things and thinking, “how’d I miss that the last four runs?” Bear in mind that I finished this novel two weeks after my 7 ½-year engagement to the love of my life ended, so MY emotions were all over the place too. I’m still trying to figure out how I even finished it after that mess. I think Nemy kept me sane somehow.
I’d say the kick-ass part of her is about the only thing that’s been a constant throughout the book as it’s changed.
Missy: I know you’ve been working on this project for a while, and I know of a couple of other projects I’m (impatiently) waiting on. Can you tell us what’s next on your publishing agenda?
Jinxie: Oh crap, that’s right. You want the werewolf book. And that “other” one that I won’t discuss in public because there’s nothing else like it on the market. =) The next one is Dusk of Death, the first of my Armageddon trilogy. I think you’ve read the original. It’s not changing much. I also hope to finish my novella Tir na nOg before the end of the year, but I’m working on finishing my Bachelor’s degree by December too, so we’ll see. After that, the werewolf book, Native Moon, will be next.
I’ll also edit and re-release The Vampyre Prophecy and Gemini soon because I’ve been working (sort of) on the third book in that series. You can read the first person POV blog called Gemini Rising, but the book itself will be third person and filled with a lot of things you won’t see on the blog. Though it’s still fun to write from my vampire Shawn’s POV. He’s probably one of my favorite characters.
Missy: Speaking of publishing, you have your hand in a few pies at the moment. How did the e-zine Forever Nocturne begin and what’s new with that project?
Jinxie: That is the understatement of the year. LOL Aside from my own writing, I’m a freelance editor, run Running Ink Press with Sharon Gerlach, designed the site and gear and write posts and attend conventions for Zombie Survival Crew, and as you mentioned, produce the free e-zine Forever Nocturne with Sharon.
FN actually began quite simply—Sharon and I carried on a conversation on each other’s profiles on the site where we all met, and I think I said, “we should just start our own damn magazine.” She agreed and the dialog continued along that vein until a friend, Tammy L Boehm, saw it and said, “DO IT!” And the rest is history. FN was put on hold for our March issue this year, but we are taking submissions for our October issue. We take short stories, poetry, and art, all of which can be submitted to forevernocturnezine (at) gmail (dot) com with the genre (short, poetry, art) in the Subject line. Attachments are only allowed for art images.
Missy: And lastly, as an author I know I put a little of myself into my heroines. Is there something of you in Nemesis? If not, is there some part of her you wish you had more of?
Jinxie: There’s quite a bit of me in Nemy, and yet, she’s evolved into her own person, which I’m in awe of, truly. The part of her I wish I had more of—aside from Clancy—is that she’s much stronger than I am, even though I had her emotions all over the place. In certain situations, the girl just kicks ass, and I do that as well, but our circumstances that bring that ability about are completely different. I have to be backed into a corner. She doesn’t at all. She’ll put you in your place immediately. Ha!
Missy: Jinxie, thank you so much for visiting my blog today! 
Since we’re both doing Birthday Blog Tours this month (because we’re both awesome Gemini gals) our readers get the gifts! Ms. Gervasio is giving away a copy of Nemesis to one lucky reader here, and I’m giving away a prize pack over on her blog. All you have to do to enter either/both is leave a comment: here answer the question, if you were written into a fantasy story, what is one trait the character would have to have to truly be you? The winners will be chosen tomorrow evening using random.org, and ALL comments on both blogs will be thrown into the pot for my Birthday Blog Tour grand prize. Good Luck!
Nemesis by N. L. Gervasio:

Prince Charming was a putz.
Prince Charming number two was even worse.
After the last prince ran off without any notice, breaking her heart and their engagement along the  way, Nemesis Mussolini swore off  men and passed the time kicking ass and slinging drinks, something her mafia father would never approve of. But, when her boss Clancy ups his flirtations, it’s difficult to remember she’s not interested, especially when he gets that delicious evil glint in his eye that has her melting. Just when Nemy starts to think all men might not be bad, she hears whispers about Clancy’s less than legal past, and wants to run like hell from the idea that he could be just like her father.
Great … Prince Charming number three may possibly be on FBI’s Most Wanted.
While Nemy and Clancy tumble down the romance road, hitting potholes every step of the way, Nemy discovers how much of her heart already belongs to Clancy, and how much of a Don’s daughter she really is. When Clancy’s daughter is kidnapped, they must work together to use every talent and connection they have to get her back, which means Nemy must learn to trust again. If they fail, Clancy could lose his daughter forever. Can Nemy surrender in time to get her happily ever after, or is she hell-bent on letting her past keep her from the one man who could be her true Prince Charming?

Bio:
N.L. “Jinxie” Gervasio was born on Friday the thirteenth. Her dad wanted to call her Jinx. Her mom said no. It took thirty-four years for her to discover the nickname, and she’s grown quite attached to it. She lives in Tempe, Arizona with Umi (her mother) and Moon (her Alaskan malamute). She enjoys riding her beach cruiser “The Betty” around downtown Tempe, loves a good pub crawl, and has had the pleasure and the heartache of experiencing a love far greater than she could have ever imagined.
She welcomes you to her world.
Links:
Unclouded Perspicacity blog: http://nlgervasio.wordpress.com
Shawn’s Twitter: http://twitter.com/Shawn_II

For a preview taste of her new release, go here: http://nlgervasio.wordpress.com/projects/nemesis/nemesis-chapter-1/